On Poverty - Blog Action Day
Welcome to our contribution to Blog Action Day, when thousands of middle-class entrepreneurs change the world by posting on their blogs AT THE SAME TIME! (Although I am a little confused, as I thought we made poverty history at Live8 a couple of years ago?)
Poverty is something that Chris Martin, and therefore the Church of CM, care deeply about. He goes to Africa and that kind of thing, but all we can do is this post.
First, some FACTS about poverty -
- Poverty is spread by a virus, just like flu, AIDS, obesity and being Chinese. It is therefore NOT THEIR FAULT, and one day a cure will be found.
- People suffering from poverty may experience some or all of the following symptoms - frustration, depression, laziness, dressing badly, smoking, regional accents, being Polish, Sun reading, heavy use of Lynx deodorant.
- There are two types of poverty. Absolute poverty is when you cant afford stuff like an iPod or a Wii. Relative poverty is when you don’t have as much money as that no-good brother-in-law of yours.
- When meeting a poverty suffererer, one should adopt a swagger, swear more than normal, and attempt to engage them in a conversation about football. This should prevent a happy-slapping or stabbing.
- Giving money to charity is a good way to avoid the feelings of guilt about buying cheap goods made by poor foreigners from Tesco, Ikea or MacDonalds.
What YOU can do to fight poverty -
- Go to Uni and make sure you get a good job.
- Learn to speak with a proper accent.
- Save your money and get on the property ladder as soon as possible.
October 15 2008 | Did you know!? and site news | 5 Comments »
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