Bono out of U2: “He’s a good melodist, but he’s a wanker. He’s obviously a completely dysfunctional character and a cretin, but he happens to be a great melodist and up there with Paul McCartney, Nate Dogg and Mark King.”
David “The Hoff” Hasselhoff: “I love those guys. I mean I really dig them. That’s a cool thing to say, right? Everybody?”
Tom “The Crew” Cruise: “Fuck Scientology!”
Miley Cyrus: “In my other life, I would definitely be, like, Chris Martin’s dream girl. He’s awesome, he’s, like, the most amazing performer. When I went to a show, he was like a saint.”
Robert “Syndrome” Downey, Jr.: “He’s a skinny guy. Like the skinniest guy I ever met, right? He’s got ribs like a toast rack in a condom. Skinny, period. But I could play a skinny guy. I should play a skinny guy…”
Kate Moss: “Fuck Coke!”
Barack Obama: “Where do you think I got the idea to save the world? Now get that muthafuckin microphone outta my mothafuckin face!”
Fran Healy out of Travis: “Chris Martin doesn’t sleep. If you plugged him in you could power a small Scottish town with all of his energy. He helped me reconstruct my tepee.”
32 years ago today, singer, songwriter, poet, philosopher and messiah Chris Martin was born. This event simultaneously sorted out the music industry and ushered in the Age of Aquarius.
To celebrate, we are delighted to present a short film entitled Be Careful What You Wish For. It was created by CoCM acolyte Nika Ostoic, and is a deeply symbolic imagining of Lost.
Looking forward to reading how all you Martinis out there interpret it. Chris be with you!