CHRIS MARTIN - FLYING SOLO?
No, ladies, this doesn’t pertain to Chris Martin finally coming to his senses and issuing a writ of bifurcation to Gwyneth GOOP, but addresses the question; Is Chris Martin ready to spread his heavenly wings and go it alone musically?
The Great One has tasted of the magnificence of sold-out world tours… adulation beyond the ordinary… thousands of gorgeous, bosomy, tall, well-spoken, college-educated, blog-writing, and worshipful females throwing themselves at him… he has a beautiful and talented actress wife and the cute-as-a-button-est children imaginable… he is able to write a hit single at the drop of a hat and has many a friend in the entertainment and music community. He’s already picked up a gaggle of Grammys… he is generous with his time and talents with respect to charities and fund-raising events… all that’s left is the Nobel Prize, but he’ll have a horse race with Saint Bono over that one!While Coldplay rest and recoup from the just-finished leg of the “Viva” tour, Holy Chris has been out there - attending Bruce Springsteen concerts in New Jersey, singing at the Black Ball in NYC and just this past weekend soloing with the “Viva” violinist at the Neil Young San Francisco charity fundraiser. All reviews of these performances have been laudatory and note how Chris is perfectly able to captivate the crowd without the pyrotechnics or special effects his music normally commands.
Not to take anything away from the other members of Coldplay, but we believe these first solo outings are Chris Martin’s baby steps at solo-ing - “testing the waters”, so to speak.
I am sure that this is probably Chris’s idea, but I can also see the hand at Gwyneth at play. I bet she was nagging him about how much time he spends away from the family and that if he was his own man, he could control his schedule better! Nevertheless, this is a fact that the Church of Chris Martin needs to consider - what would it mean to our Blessed Endeavor if Dear Chris were to unhitch his Coldplay wagon? The Church needs to do some appraising of the situation and ask Father Drobbingdon for a specific liturgy or ecumenical statement on the matter. It is especially pertinent now that the “concept album” is coming to fruition: the Church must be UNDIVIDED in its position on the “Chris Solo Idea” and not give coldplaying.com any ammunition to shoot us with!
Perhaps we need a sit-down meeting where this very important matter might be hashed out among the Church Elders, with special lyrical searchings to see if this is something that Chris himself has been hinting at? Yes, Great Church of Chris Love, we must have our hand in this affair, because it concerns Us, the Church, our website, our google ratings, and the also the ability of Gwyneth Goop to successfully henpeck the Glorious One to ditch the buddies from his youth to stake out a solo claim to further fame.
Let us ask for HEAVENLY GUIDANCE and also input from the 3 Saints who now guide us. Beseech our helpers to inspire Chris Martin to make wise choices in regard to his career future, as they impact and influence many beyond Coldplay, and particularly us - the Great & Holy Church of Chris Martin.
May the Chris Be With You. Praise & Glory to All. Amen.
November 03 2009 12:16 am | news
Gossip Girl on 04 Nov 2009 at 8:33 pm #
“The celebrity gossip world instead were running a story on Chris Martin allegedly seen publicly making out with Kate Bosworth at a U2 concert - U.S. mag Star is publishing this story even though there’s no physical proof that this happened.” …from coldplaying.com Twitter….looks like this playa Martin just MIGHT be flying solo…?
BrotherRob on 12 Nov 2009 at 2:19 am #
I guess whether or not an individual decides to break from the present and do something different is entirely up to them in the end. It worked for Wayne Newton pretty good eh, why not for Pretty Boy Floyd?
And I don’t say that as a derogatorationalairy statement about how good looking Chris Martin is, nor am I comparing him in any way to the great Wayne Newton (looks or talent). Wayne is in a performance / image universe dedicated to him exclusively and thank God for that. Praise be to Wayne.
Chris Martin solo? Go and do what ever you want but keep Coldplay going until the last is my worldly advice. The Coldplay sound is ALL of them.
The Coldplay sound is Chris Martin framed by Jonny, Will and Guy but like a rose or a tree no individual part is greater or less than any other part… especially from the perspective of the viewer.
What they have already accomplished is beyond description. As is all the great music / any genre ever writen / recorded.
I remember once watching this show on some photographer
and this guy would wait for his shot. And I mean wait.
The moment was an eagle flying through a rising full moon with a few clouds silhouetting both and below an elk perched on the top of a mountain ridge, looking up. And they say there is no God.
And so it it with us, music, life and everything. Why or how did these guys all end up together and for what purpose? There are so many great artists. Viva La Variety and Viva La Coldplay variety especially.
My point is, by the combination of all their energy, they have become what they are. The music comes from all of them, it’s just that the spotlight lands on Chris Martin.
To paraphrase that great American fool Ronald Reagan, if it’s not broken, don’t fix it.
The truth is, they are all so talented but maybe not noticed or appreciated enough with a talent like Chris Martin in front of them. Together they have accomplished the universe and maybe they con do a lot more still to come?
I personally think their sound is the living end and do not feel well contemplating a world with no Coldplay. Now that is a scary thought for sure.
It would be like living in Paradise with no music. Or at least not so much music as heartfelt as what Coldplay do… so very well on plastic AND Live.
May the Chris be with you as the ever changing tapestry of your own existence blows in the cold and relentless wind.
Highest Priest Designator on 13 Nov 2009 at 1:48 am #
My esteemed BrotheRob:
It is with great pleasure that today I announce a great honor indeed for you and the invaluable services you have rendered to The Church of Chris Martin.
Father Drobbingdon-in a wise and unparsimonious mood-has offered me the primary responsibility of kicking upstairs to Highest Eldership-the most deserving of Church adherents.
For my C:O:C: girl & M:O:R:C:O:C: men’s group volunteerism, I have accumulated much good will and spiritual lucre that I can now spend on boosting you-BrotheRob up into the stratosphere of the Church’s hierarchy-where you can now Lord it over one-and-all along with the Great Father.
I must tell you, in exchange for this political back-scratching-BrotheRob-I will need you to step up and babysit the Holy Glastonbury 3 Pilgrims. Those horny sojourners are fresh out of sex addict rehab and already are chasing C:O:C: girls all over the Church sanctuary.
Our confessional booths are little more than orgy pits for those testosterone-addled sex junkies. I will beseech you to try and rein their outrageous antics in so they will not bring additional shame onto the Church’s good name.
I hereby cast into the Great Beyond the name-BrotheRob and elevate this sainted soul into the Church of Chris Martin High Eldership. Your new title: High Priest Rob-with all the attendant Holy honors, C:O:C: freebies, & ceremonial duties-so help me God.
Next time you prowl the corridors of sin and illegal substances in DrugWars Vancouver, know now you are not just merely another depraved john or strung-out dope buyer. YOU are now a exhalted official of The Church of Chris Martin, and THAT FACT ALONE should garner you a higher-caliber hooker (with teeth) or at least a discount on some good hashish! I remain-the True Widow-High Female Elder and Church C:O:C: Volunteer Chaperone.
God (and Chris) Bless You-High Priest Rob & may your beautiful spirit soar into the ether realm of heavenly rapture and LOVE! Amen.