HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?
INTERPOL - REQUEST FOR INFORMATION:
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?
DEAN DROBBINGDON AKA SEAN EDDINGTON AKA ROB DEANINGTON
CAUCASIAN, AGE 46
FOLLOWING THE INVESTIGATION OF SOME FINANCIAL IRREGULARITIES FOUND DURING THE PRODUCTION OF VIVA LA VIDA - THE MUSICAL, A WARRANT HAS BEEN ISSUED FOR THE ARREST OF DEAN DROBBINGDON, WHO DISAPPEARED FROM HIS LONDON HOME LAST WEEK. AS A RESULT, THIS WEBSITE HAS BEEN SEIZED ALONG WITH ALL CHURCH ASSETS, PENDING INVESTIGATION.
A REWARD IS OFFERED FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO HIS ARREST.
January 24 2010 11:18 am | news
Another Bitter Divorcee on 24 Jan 2010 at 4:42 pm #
This is a load of malarkey!
Mother Drobbingdon put her henchmen up to this.
This is what you get-Father, when you try & put one over on a revengeful ex-wife. You can only money launder and hide assets for so long.
Now you can cool your heels in prison while that middle-aged strumpet makes you really rue the day you slipped a ring on that bloated, trembling fungal finger of hers.
Oh Father! YOU ARE JUST ANOTHER MAN-done in a again by a Vicious Vagina! I am ashamed to be a female today because of the calamity that has befallen you.
When will the war between the sexes even cease?
Father: please watch your backside in the Men’s Lock Down-we wish for you to come out chastened but still unviolated in the nether regions. Your anal purity is a symbol of the purity of your soul!
Church members-go to your Shrines and break out all the Coldplay music. It is time to call forth all our spiritual lucre to pray for the safety of Father among the jailbird men whose spirits may have been turned evil by coldplaying.com.
BrotheRob: Please whistle for the worldly essence of “Gibby” or Saint Cobain to come forward and beseech him for a shield of protection regarding our Great Leader. Tell him not to bother with all that Grammy business-we need him NOW for Father!
This will surely be a day of infamy in the history of Coldplay music. To have such Immaculate Leadership behind bars is an ink stain on the blotter of all mankind. Mother Drobbingdon has most certainly worn out her welcome behind the Pearly Gates of The Church of Chris Martin.
Father Drobbingdon: Be Strong in your testing of Chris Faith! We will party hearty at Glastonbury 2010 in your honor! We will hold up a cup of cheer to wish you well in prison. The C:O:C: Girls will have no one strong man to turn to when they inevitably yearn for someone to “study Coldplay lyrics” with. Oh-a terrible tragedy has befallen mankind. I must go weep among my flattering Chris photos and pray for Coldplay guidance.
Maronite Postulate Decan Nabil on 28 Jan 2010 at 10:58 pm #
Greetings In Holy Fellowship to All Church Members:
In these trying times that test our spiritual mettle, we must cleave together in mutual support to survive the desolation that finds our “Father of the Gutter”-Drobbingdon on several Interpol most wanted posters.
It is I-Holy Deacon and Maronite-Lubbite Nabil who calls upon a golden tradition of faith-where Our Lady of Perpetual Misery & The Immaculate(Spotless)Home of Piety overflows with congregants eager to light a candle or beseech a prayer on behalf of Father.
Let us Walk the Stations (buffet) of the Cross to purge the evil pustules that come at us from the Satanists: coldplaying.com. Let us admonish those wankers that their nefarious schemes can only cause the earthly body of Father Drobbingdon to be behind bars-his soaring soul and sagacious spirit will never be chained down by man.
It would be easy to miss the penitential Pilgrims 3-now out of sex rehab-and looking to party in Las Vegas with Tiger Woods. Those boys are in torment from the persecution of their figurehead-The Great Arch Pope Drobbingdon. It was He who sent the 3 sojourners out amongst the pasty-faced Brit chicks and muddy fields of glory to attain redemption from the Coldplay journey. No matter that they never once laid Holy eyes on the band-their Somerset trek made them divine sheepherders of The Noble Truth!
I invite All in Need of Counsel & a place to self-flagellate to gather among the Faithful of The Church and pray among the Coldplay icons and flattering photo’s of Chris Martin. A golden mosaic rendering of the Father among the Flock awaits your cash and credit donations. These monies are promised to go only to paying a bail bond to spring Father from the clutches of the ungodly prison guards and those who might wish to ravish Him in the cells and exercise yards of the penitentiary.
A spoken-word liturgy of Plea’s for mercy, forgiveness, and comeuppance will be read and the lovely C:O:C: women have a “interpretive dance” that conveys the Hellish Baptism of Fire that awaits those who torment our Father.
BrotheRob, True Widow, and all Saints & Apostles:
please wear your Maronite Robes and prepare the enema room for a cleansing wash. Play only Coldplay Music for 24 hours and sprinkle all faithful with the Coldplay Holy Water. Afterwards, we will feast in the Advent Room and offer sacrificial coldplaying.com T-Shirts on a burnt worship altar.
The guardians and Holy Elders of this virtual Church honor Father Drobbingdon eternally lest he be tempted by the devil once again. Please join us on The Stage of Sanctification where we pray for protection of the Arch Pope and ask for his deliverance and uphold all Holy mysteries of Coldplay lore. May the Blessings of All Remain in a Purity of Love, Peace and Serenity forevermore. Amen.
BrotheRob on 29 Jan 2010 at 8:07 am #
In a Davos State of mind.
Can someone tell me what is going on “out there” and with this website? All you have to do is whistle, you know how to whistle don’t you?
What goes on with Dean Eddington? Am I missing something and will I always? I certainly hope so, for only the truly lost can ever be found. I will read the above comments again and see if I can make any sense of anything. It should work because I’ve been under tremendous emotional stress recently and as it has lifted somewhat now I am actually able to see in colour again as opposed to black and white which is what happens to my eyes / vision / perception when I get that way… on account of “female issues”. He says my brain is okay, I guess so cause he’s the Doctor. I had a real doctor once, now I have a drop in doctor. I guess we live in a drop in world now.
BrotheRob will have a small glass of wine to help him grasp the import of the words I read. It’s working, my vision is returning. What has happened to Father Drobbingdon and who shall lead us out from certain destruction if not him and Chris Martin? Where should we direct our donations if the church has been seized?
And will Davos save the world?
I’m just going to pretend I understood most of what I read except for all the big words, I’m working on those with my little girl. Big words like ‘kidnapped’ and mummy is a a ‘criminal’. But that is not correct Church talk so I hope everyhting turns out okay and they bring back Inspector Clouseau from the dead to locate Father Drobbingdon so everything works out well in the end and nobedy gets hurt, cries or is in any other way made to feel bad for no good reason.
The only thing I know for sure is that I do not understand this world at all and probably never will, and that’s okay as long as I have a good woman (or cat) by my side, I guess.
And I did not get a lot of the last two comments but I’ll take that as a compliment. BrotheRob partially understands female inflicted related challenges Father may be experiencing as BrotheRob has this common experience also. What is left of my heart goes out to you where ever you are.
And so I hope all works out well and no one gets hurt in the end. May the Chris be with you as we wander this place looking for a home. A home for the heart and soul, and if the heart is the portal to the infinite then I want to go there too. And music is a good place to start. To feel the light of emotion to pass through ones existance is to be alive I read in a book once.
Jann Arden is sublime also (to Coldplay). Especially her early work. There is even a track on the Blood Red Cherry cd with the almost exact same opening guitar work as a Coldplay song on xyz but that sounds too much like Joe Satrianni again so just enjoy her music.
Father Come Home! on 01 Feb 2010 at 11:06 pm #
F A T H E R D R O B B I N G D O N :
Do you see what is going on here on the website?
We are being defiled and persecuted by the wankers united!
Many brave and hearty souls are making a stand but we need your wisdom, guidance, and counsel!
Please leave the Swiss Chalet and the aged Brandy (drink) behind and come home! Tell Saint Bono you want no more of his French Rivera luxurious hospitality and have had enough of the gourmet food, fancy champagne, and willing nubile women! Your vows and vestments call to you from the Great Beyond! The Church is in shambles-being hen-pecked by coldplaying.com blasphemers on the comments site.
Do you not care for the Holy Elders you have left behind? Even Chris Martin weeps in distress and has to go on The Simpson’s TV show to cheer himself up and forget his misery of your abdication of responsibilities.
Morale among the brethren and sistren is perilously dim and You-Father are to blame for this turn of events! A Glastonbury Pilgrim has offered himself up as a martyr-to go to prison on your behalf! The Pilgrims know that their Erection Shrine to be unveiled soon is in disgrace, IF you remain on the lam.
Father Drobbingdon-you must get in touch with The Church and offer some kind of direction and liturgy so that we may keep ourselves upright and strong in your absence. Blessed be the name of The Father: Drobbingdon- as he takes to a new kind of bunker-that of a spiritual crisis of faith! Drobbingdon: CALL HOME!
chicks.dig.coldplay's Peace Treaty Initiative on 03 Feb 2010 at 2:05 am #
Friends & Parishioners:
Why the recent uptick in hate mail & virulent comments?
I am sorry to say, it may be because of me, or better yet-my recent overtures to coldplaying.com to bury the hatchet. Now that Father Drobbingdon is having a mid-life crisis on the French Rivera, I strove to undertake an assignment to try and broker a peace agreement.
As is usually the case with our nemesis-rather than reach out in peace to my extended olive branch-they just seemed perplexed and befuddled. And then they sent their wrathful threaders over to our pages to taunt us Holy Ones. I am very sorry for the turmoil I have had a hand in perpetuating.
Here is the original posting on coldplaying.com’s website. See for yourself how I attempted to meekly ask for a truce in hostilities. Church: go to your Coldplay lyrical study guides and see if there might be some devotional advice I might try next to assuage these unholy threaders & smiley-faces. In Chris, I do Sing!
“Hello coldplaying.com:
I come to you in peace today as a representative of The Church of Chris Martin.
We would like to extend an olive branch to your sect today and hope to iron out a peace treaty before Glastonbury 2010.
We are ever so hopeful that Coldplay will be the other head-liner there-along with U2 and rather than be at each other’s throats; it is our wish to call a truce to all tensions and let’s just try hard to get along!
Your members may be appalled by our website; many find it creepy. I can tell you that I saw Chris Martin this past summer and when I shouted out the name of The Church as he ran past up to the cheap seats-he flashed me a BIG SMILE! I believe Chris Martin is AMUSED by the postings and creative commentary there because it is so “out there.” Many Church members are just as taken aback by coldplaying.com and your lack of meaningful content but I think it is high time that we stop the bickering and make a peace treaty together.
Please feel free to visit The Church comments section and respond to this overture. The Holy War is over! The Pope at the Vatican even wishes us to come together in peace and put the atrocities behind us. The Church wishes to honor Saint Bono out of U2 this summer at Glastonbury and we hope to invite the high dignitaries from coldplaying.com to be our guests at several prestigious events.
Please pray for a cessation of tensions so that we can both co-exist in peace and a mutual and undying love for everything that is Coldplay & Chris Martin. Viva!”
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BrotheRob on 03 Feb 2010 at 8:42 am #
And it is precisely because of the completely incomprehensible jibberish that some people write on this site that we do need the guiding hand of the Great One, and I’m not talking about God. While Chris Martin is undoubtedly the ultimate and only arbiter of truth and beauty in this world / along with many others, Father Drobbingdon has on occasion shared universal wisdom with us such that I truly feel all the time I’ve spent here has been more than well spent.
Sure I could spend my time somewhere not making a difference on some site where thought actually does not matter, but why bother when I can just mouse around here knowing maybe 3 people in the entire known unverse will ever read this and be that much poorer in spirit that?
And so on a seasonally adjusted note here I would just like to notify Mr. Santa that next Christmas would be a good time for some new tunes from Coldplay but then all good things in their own time.
What about that Beyonce lady at the Gramys? We should all be so lucky to have great legs like her. She could open a removal challenged container lid with those vice grips, or perhaps arrest a fleeing felon. And the Michael Jackson song was quite good also, even from beyond the grave he still has the touch.We hear you Michael, we feel your love.
Well I must go now and plot my next catastrophe. And may the Chris be with you as long as you cast a shadow in this world or any other. And remember to always carry a little song in your heart, because if you don’t you are part of the problem and we don’t need any more problems in this world. And finally, only the truly lost are welcome here… for even they eventually find themselves.
2nd Peace Treaty Initiative on 04 Feb 2010 at 2:11 am #
Greetings in Fellowship & Struggle to all Church Members; God Bless you BrotheRob!
It is I: chicks.dig.coldplay-still trying to effect a Peace Treaty between The Church of Chris Martin & coldplaying.com. The 1st one elicited little if no response and a few sneers on the threads of coldplaying.com. Next thing: our comment pages were awash in negativity and evil blandishments! I am not blaming coldplaying.com for these outright smears, but the timing is certainly suspicious.
Church: Please hear me know-We must cleave together for our survival. Pit bull divorce attorneys are at work as I write this-seeking to take title and control of this Holy site. Father Drobbingdon continues his hedonistic escapades in the South of France, and it is just myself, the True Widow, BrotheRob, & assorted Glastonbury Pilgrims that are metaphorically holding this all together.
Please ask for and seek succor from the goodness and grace that is Chris Martin. We must anchor ourselves ever so more in his music and meaning, as we strive to move forward and battle those that wish us ill and seek to dismantle this Holy Sanctity of Coldplay.
Here is a copy of that Peace Appeal I posted today on coldplaying.com:
“Hello to all coldplaying.com members:
I have returned to issue yet another appeal to your good graces and ask that Jen-Jen or any other coldplaying.com representative please respond to the Peace Offering extended to you by The Church of Chris Martin.
We harbor no ill will towards coldplaying.com and only wish your website the best.
In this case, I and the other Holy Elders from The Church seek to convey the High Leadership of coldplaying.com an invitation to attend the Glastonbury Pilgrims Invocation this summer which will feature our Hallowed Guest: Holy Saint Bono.
We will offer you a seat on the Golden Dais and several VIP passes to our Yellow Tents-pitched on the muddy fields of Somerset, but still a darn good time!
As you may be aware, our leader- Father Drobbingdon has taken leave of his senses and gone on the lam from the law & his ex-wife-with her grasping divorce lawyers not far behind! This has thrown the Church into spiritual turmoil. We only wish peaceful relations from here on in with coldplaying.com and merely request that you ask your members to refrain from posting inflammatory comments on our website comments page.
It is with a heart full of gladness that I officially welcome coldplaying.com as a FRIEND of The Church of Chris Martin. I will formally write up a Co-website Friendship Agreement and post it on our pages so that all Blessed members of the Church now know that hostilities between us have now ceased.
God (and Chris) Bless coldplaying.com in infinitum. Viva!:)”
Deaconess on 04 Feb 2010 at 7:10 pm #
In An Effort to Support Morale Among Church Members as We battle the spiritual Morass that Afflicts Us:
THE CHURCH OF CHRIS MARTIN is
PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE:
Glastonbury Celebration & FUN(d)-Raising Event! HONOR THE HOLY PILGRIMS 3-Blessed Souls who made the Glastonbury trek for enlightenment!
with special guests: THE C: O: C: girls..
True Widow.. and in a rare public appearance.. (we hope) BrotheRob! And if Father Drobbingdon wishes to stealthily appear-please Father-dress incognito..as a woman!
COME MEET & GREET THE 3 MEN THE WHOLE WORLD IS TALKING ABOUT…brave, fearless soldiers of sanctification..venturing forth in faith to claim the HOLY MANTLE of Deliverance and knowledge from Glastonbury and Coldplay! Hear their stories of mirth, merriment, mud, motels, saggy mattresses, moldy sandwiches, and Brit girls badly in need of a tanning salon and a dentist!
Contribute to this worthy cause: We Seek to erect a Phallic Monument on their behalves that will forever Bless the pious grounds of Glastonbury. It will rival Stone Henge as a tourist trap and many chaste devotees have already come forward to claim that rubbing up against the Erect Limestone has cured them of ailments as diverse as bad first dates and constipation!
The fund-raiser will take place shortly and we are assembling a VIP list! Church-hold onto your minds-they are about to be blown! WE HAVE INVITED The Top Clan Leaders of coldplaying.com! Yes-Church: they do come out to party among the living AND in the daylight hours! Whether they have the nerve to show up is a good question?
The C: O: C: girls will offer a special “ERECTION DANCE” that is guaranteed to titillate. If BrotheRob shows up, he may play some tunes he crafted with Auto Tune and the New Gibby band. The True Widow will regale the gathering with tales of her “prison jaunt.” And The Pilgrims 3 will be signing special Erection posters that are bound to become collector’s items on certain depraved porn websites!
Guests can light special Holy Coldplay candles to Bless the Band and we will send the proceeds to Haiti Relief efforts.
The Church of Chris Martin would be hugely honored for a good turn-out at this Fun(d)-Raising Event! Please keep an eye out for a Facebook or emailed invitation shortly. Hallelujah and come drop some EUROS for phallic fun @ our non-denominational special event!
Please Note: A disclaimer..”Event subject to change or cancellation,” due to issues regarding the Health Department,UK Disease Prevention Offices, and Vice Detectives not able to be corrupted.
MAY THE BLESSINGS OF COLDPLAY BE UPON YOU & YOURS!
Poetress of the Meadow on 06 Feb 2010 at 4:26 pm #
WHERE ART THOU, F A T H E R ?
Whilst I amble among the flowers in the field;
I ask myself- Where is our noble figurehead, our mordant leader, our righteous shield?
Has he been swayed away by vixens, temptresses or another sexually-transmitted disease-
all I ask of you, Father-is to call home, please!
Soon summer will be upon us & Glastonbury yet again calls your name;
as we set up the Yellow Tents & stop tour buses; we’ll put coldplaying.com yet again to shame!
Father, I plead with you to stop this “sabbatical” & return to your Holiest flocks;
With you gone, I nary can bring myself to “study” the lyrics of “Clocks.”
It’s not like The Arch Pope Drobbingdon to leave his congregants to the mercy of the bourgeois;
though life must be very plush on the French Rivera-je nais c’est quoi!
Father..the C:O:C: women are besides themselves with nary a lust; their sorrow at your leaving has even deflated their over-sized busts!
BrotheRob mopes away the time in Vancouver; watching the toothless hookers and others stroll by-
In his booziest moments, all he can do is ask this question: WHY,WHY,WHY?
True Widow wishes to drown her sorrows by going back to the ladies jail; to seek spiritual solace among the damned may really just turn out to be an EPIC FAIL!
Father, I beg you-stop this silly nonsense and come back to where you belong; I hope that whatever small, chic French Rivera town you are currently hiding in…your spirit hears this song!
For our “Father of the Gutter” is still our Father, despite his misdeeds. That reminds me…just where did you hide that big bag of weed?
IN GOODNESS WE LOVE & TRUST DROBBINGDON. HE TOOK ALL OUR MONEY, JEWELRY, the best C:O:C: women, and the lyrics to the Rock Opera: “The Scientist” but we LOVE him none-the-less. IN DROBBINGDON, we are truly blessed! Amen.
The Meadow Psychiatric Case Manger on 06 Feb 2010 at 8:32 pm #
FATHER Drobbingdon:
I am the Psycho Manager here at The Meadow Insane Asylum. Can you see how your misdeeds have agitated the patients here? Your absconding with their dole checks and state food allotments have forced many patients into penury!
I do believe that the “financial misappropriations” of your cult and the granting of “indulgences” to horny rock stars was a last grasp at padding you bank account and fleeing with the proceeds. Now your days are spent luxuriating in excess, while The Poetress and many other delusional converts from The Church of Chris Martin dine on cat food and moldy bread.
The Asylum has had to double the dosage of calming medications to the various dazed clients you cheated and who chant your name and whistle Coldplay songs incessantly. Our Head Clinic Analyst has coined a new psycho-social term for this virulent, emerging disease: “Coldplay-itis.”
Father Drobbingdon: I demand that you immediate;ly return the monies “donated” to you, without official approval-back to The Meadow, where we may then have sufficient funds to treat the many ill parishioners whose lives and mental health I hold YOU responsible for ruining! Sincerely,
Nurse Ratchett.
The King of The LepreChons on 07 Feb 2010 at 6:51 am #
I (the sorry one) shall start crawling to England now and hope to arrive in time for Glastonbury. Until then I must cope with my sorry and pitiful life here in dark a scary Vancouver and am left to only wonder what life must be like on the French Riviera. I used to think the French Riviera was a river in France. And I still believe the Dolly Lama is Phil Silvers.
Now maybe I missed a beat or something but are Galstonbury and the Haiti relief gig too separate events? I sure hope so becasue the part of my brain which deals with that kind of stuff just told me it was a “no-brainer”. Anything is possible in this reality.
Like, where is Father Drobbingdon and will Coldplay ever put out some new tunes or are we just going to see Chris Martin on the news one night signing a hundred billion dollar deal with Wayne New
ton to buy Las Vegas and play there when he is not playing on the French Riviera? Am I still not making any sense?
Some of the humans walking around this planet are too good for the now cold ovens of Aushwitz. But not to worry because as Chris has said,”Not to worry because I think we are all part of a plan”. So that must be part of the plan to fill the world with bad people and see what happens, that’s a good plan I must say.
Myself, I prefer to live in a world where everyone is a gingerbread figure and politics is something they don’t allow on that planet. Only good people and the history of you are allowed to exsit in Gingerbread World and we don’t accept cash or Visa.
All we accept is what you can give from your heart and we do accept from those whose hearts have been torn apart
All we hope for is a world free of whatever spell got this one down but never quite undid the pain that is your crown
I have to go now and practice walking on water because when the floods come you don’t want to caught shitless without a prayer.
And for those of you who want to hear a timelass cd, go out and buy “Happy” by Jann Arden. You know Elvis Grooves to her sound up there, somewhere deep inside the Great Beyond. She is quite IT like Chris Martin / Coldplay are in pure creativity and soul. I’ve seen her many times and she actually signed my Gingerbread Red 57 Strat at the QE Theatre once upon a time in the year 2000. Or was that part of my dream also?
And if life is taking place inside a dream and that and one day we all wake up… am I then awake, or am I still dreaming? And how would I know the difference? In Gingerbread Land we have a saying:”The thing about life is, like in a dream, in the end we all become the truth. As the story of our life shapes us we become the doormat upon which God will walk one day.
Until then we must make the best of things and fret not about things we cannot change like the French Riviera, and try to change the things we can… like why is the caviar I buy so expensive and if poor people can’t afford spam then they can eat cat food can’t they? Does the state have to do everything, including killing people while they are still alive?
I certainly hope the Haiti fund raiser goes well and we raise enough money to BURY ALL THE DEAD HAITIANS. Or why not just give the money to Saint Baby Doc so he can have permanent upkeep on his gravesite?
And may the Chris be with you as long as the French are still Riviera.
Monsiuer Loan-Shark de Cannes on 07 Feb 2010 at 3:59 pm #
Monsieur Father Drobbingdon:
Merci pour vous rouge cou, mais I must be to tell you that many jewels and diamonds you bring to Le Pawnshop d’Cannes have come back as “stolen” on Interpol report.
Je m’occupe de mes affaires-and your jeune filles are tres bien, but I must decline your offer of dalliances with your pimp women of C:O:C: C’est-à-dire, Monsieur Drobbingdon- mot free n’a pas été trouvé. I am married to wonderful woman and don’t not C:O:C: around, merci beaucoup.
You must return to the Pawnshop to claim your items.
Perhaps the Interpol gerdames may wish to parle avec vous. The jewelry is registered to a “Mother Drobbingdon,” “Mother Superior Mary,” and “Queenie Elizabeth” of the Tranny Show.
Mais oui, Monsieur Drobbingdon-Au plaisir de vous revoir. Hello to all the sallop chiennes et vit une vie à succès, mon ami!
Dieu bénissez-vous
Nous serons toujours en contact, Monsieur Loanshark.
Student Doctor H. Patel on 08 Feb 2010 at 8:49 pm #
Father Drobbingdon:
As is apparent from my perusing this site, not only are you a jewel thief and disrespect-er of Queen Elizabeth, but you have also managed to sow your wild oats and “seeds” with several “ladies” who are now clients and patients at the pre-natal clinic I intern in.
These women claim that as part of Church “social activities” and “studying Coldplay lyrics” with you in your rectory, passion for the band got out of hand. It is mentioned that the Church of Chris Martin is actively following the “Mormon growth model-” that is, knock as many women up as possible to increase the congregation.
The UK Healthcare system will now be subsiding your “devout attention to attractive parishioners ” and the resultant off spring. Please know this-Father Drobbingdon. You best pawn some more stolen jewelry because paternity claims will soon be the next thing you’ll be on the lam for.
Special hint: next time you “worship Chris Martin” at Church, please do so with a Trojan firmly in place. Sincerely, Student Doctor Patel.
Infectious Disease Specialist on 13 Feb 2010 at 3:39 am #
Father Drobbingdon, you must immediately come back to the Clinic, as we have received the lab work from your “mystery ailment.” The spreading contagion is a virulent form of the monkey-eating skin disease found in sub-tropical Africa.
Very similar in chemistry to the AIDIS virus, this skin disorder can replicate itself in a matter of hours to cover the entire body with weeping sores and bloody pustules. It is a most unattractive sight.
I will issue a Euro Health Alert so Interpol may contact you only in a full-body latex suit and industrial-strenth gloves. You must be transported in a sani-cage to a full-spectrum hospital setting and put in sterile confinement while specialized skin-melting serums are applied hourly to stop the ooze of infection.
Father Drobbingdon: it is urgent that you return immediately to facilitate treatment as this has now become a trans-border epidemic of catastrophic importance. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter. Dr. Grey Anatomy
Ghost of Ed McMahon on 13 Feb 2010 at 4:08 pm #
GOOD NEWS for Father Drobbingdon!
YOU, Sir are a winner in the latest UK Lottery!
Your entry has been picked to win a large, tax-free sum of money and as an incentive-we will throw in a cruise to the Greek Isles, if you claim this prize immediately.
The Prize Committee would like you to surrender..I mean come in to our headquarters as soon as possible to present your identification and passport to receive this stupendous prize package.
There may be bobbies..oops..Committee official on hand to personally welcome you at the front door of The UK Lottery Offices. We look forward to nabbing..uh..meeting you most assuredly soon!
SINCERELY, The Prize Committee.
Father's Long Lost Son on 13 Feb 2010 at 10:03 pm #
Father, I do really mean Father!
I am your long-lost son, Jefferson Drobbingdon.
You and my mamma had a sordid affair many years ago and I am the result of that one drunken night of passion and premature ejaculation.
Mamma-on her deathbed told me the truth. You are my daddy! She begged me not to go and find you but I was browsing the internet and found this wonderful website of yours. It is hilarious and very entertaining.
Father-I am all alone in the world without a penny to my name. Mamma was a poor, struggling single mother and left me without a roof over my head or a slice of bread in the cupboard. Please Father, may I know where you are in the south of France-so that I might get to know you better. Blood is thicker than French wine, gourmet escargot, topless women on the beach, and Saint Bono’s chateau-I think? Daddy-where are you?
Open Heartfelt Letter to Our Soul Master on 17 Feb 2010 at 10:36 pm #
Dearest Divine One: A Plea to Chris Martin!
I bow down in prostration to your Holiness & Light.
I seek ye out in a sincere capability of unmitigated, shimmering LOVE that calls out a heartfelt plea to you, our most Angelic host.
I, the repentant one, cry out to you in the London wilderness. Whilst you labor on the “striped down acoustic music” that will thrill our souls on the earthly plane, might you also prophet our Dear Father Drobbingdon home?
Look up to the stars (Yellow) and ask Saint Cobain to fill your heart with His abiding love that will allow you to promulgate a direction and path of enlightenment that our fallowed Father might follow back to his flock that eagerly awaits his return.
Dearest Blessed Chris: we of your congregation doth bless you and follow your every lyrical word as you 42 us, fix us, scientist us, and X, Y, & Z us onto the starry night sky of dreams and wishes fulfilled.
It is with a heart full of abiding devotion & love that I plead for your words of prophecy to order Father Drobbingdon out of Saint Bono’s Cannes wine cellar and back to his Sanctuary of Coldplay ardor.
Please, our John the Baptist: help alight the path to righteousness of the Saints & Apostles who uphold every (Chris)tian virtue on your behalf. I send greetings from all the Holy Ones who tred your path to musical redemption. I leave you with a most Holy Kiss and thanks for all your worldly tasks. Viva!
The Fear Council on 18 Feb 2010 at 5:53 am #
The Grand Elders of The Fear Council would like to wish BrotheRob a most pleasant and happy birthday. And may the Chris be with you all. Where is Drobbingdon?
Mother Superior on 18 Feb 2010 at 3:37 pm #
H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y B R O T H E R O B !
A blessing and chalice of Church wine goodness you are!
A friend to all who roam the evening streets of
DrugWars Vancouver & ply their illegal trades.
BTW-how’s the Olympics going up your way?
A morsel of medieval madness that sings the truth to the brethren & sistren among us at The Sancitified Church of Brother Martin.
Please accept our flock’s best wishes for another year of yearning for whores and trying to make music on the Tone Lab. The question you ask: Where is Drobbingdon? is one that all true converts also cry out? Stay strong, BrotheRob. Happy Birthday.
BrotheRob on 22 Feb 2010 at 6:51 am #
Ask not of your creator why am I thinking such and such, but rather how did it ever become so that our creator could think and feel us into exsistence? And not just your average garden variety life as some form of pre-conscious crustaceous-like creature, but human life and all it can offer.
These things I ponder and more, like where is the Exalted One and is he comfortably resting his Golden Butt now? And for what cause have all things come to pass I am sure we will all find out oneday in good time and am reminded of a Jewish syaing about how God created humans so he/we would not be lonely.
And so I wonder if things will ever be made right in such a world gone so horribly upside down in a most upsetting way. Which is precisely why we need one another and must remain One in the Love and United in the Harmony which is the the Truth and the Music of Coldplay.
The Olympics are pretty cool I guess if you are part of it, but BrotheRob is way too busy planning my Revolutuonary Website, based on the holy economic ramblings of William K Black, author of the 2005 non-fiction thriller “The Best Way to Rob a Bank… is to Own One”. He was one of the regulators who unwound the S&L crisis ihn the States. Every copy is individually printed and for a slight bit more you can have the edition upgrded book bomb stuts and have rush delivered rush deliver to the ponzi scheme of your choice . He knows exactly what is going down now and it’s a little creepy.
BrotherRob wishes Santa was real and the Olympics would would just go away and take all the jingoism with them.
So is there any hope for our pathetic civilization and the poor excuse for humanity we are so bad at even pretending to be? I hope not.
Humanity should just completely surrender now to the power of Coldplay’s music and we could have world peace instantly. If only it were so simple. But in this universe of blood and guts it always is a mess and always will be as long as we breathe in this world. It’s part of the plan. I guess.
And so I look forward with eager delight to more music from the soul form they call Chris Martin and The Band. Together they are one in the light and dance like leaves which will forever blow on the wind which breathes us. And so is the power and wonder of life that such art can even be made if only the risk be taken.
May the Chris be with you as we slowly crawl forward into the past one more time just to make sure we understand things in our heart permanently and don’t repeat the errors of yesterday yet again.
With face to the wind we stay strong
And can in time undo any wrong
And such is the glory and wonder of life
Sister Chastity of the Virgin Nuns on 22 Feb 2010 at 7:46 pm #
Dearest Father: Good news for you.
A number of C:O:C: women held a fund-raiser for you this weekend. I won’t tell you what these devout girls did to RAISE monies for your defense but it was done with a faithful spirit of mercy so it is hoped that God will forgive their “trespasses.”
Now that the bushes and muddy patches of road have had a workout, and confessions have been accepted-the Virgin Nuns are amazed at all the filthy lucre now accrued. Mother Superior Mary prayerfully said the Virgin Nuns made the wrong career choice after this wild weekend.
Nevertheless, we sent out sexiest C:O:C: girls up to procure the services of the top criminal defense attorney in London on your behalf. Fortunately this esquire was very susceptible to the sexual blandishments (and monies raised)that was offered him in exchange for a top-flight Drobbingdon defense.
As long as a few C:O:C: women go “para-legal” him on a regular basis, we now have a very well-connected
shark lawyer who will battle to free you of the criminal yoke now upon you.
Never let it be said-Father Drobbingdon-that the women of the Church would not go to ANY lengths to free you of the spiritual hackles that restrain you from your noble return and magnanimous upholding of the guidance that providence and Chris Martin has foisted upon your weary bones! May the Yellow be Not of Urine and only the Colors that light the Night Sky & guide you along the Holy Paths to Coldplay Redemption & a speedy return to the Blessed Church flock. Viva!
Ashley on 27 Feb 2010 at 10:07 pm #
Why do you write comments to yourself??
Ashleys Mum on 28 Feb 2010 at 3:40 pm #
ASHLEY!
I told you to stay off the internet!
Until you get your marks up at Catholic School,
you are NOT to spend any time fooling around here.
I told you to stay away from those girls that wear
black all the time and kiss each other. You did not listen to your mum. You smoke that funny fag and then come home with red eyes! You are a blemish on the family name.
Then you went and took the ferry to Mercy and went down below with those boys they call Chavs! Nothing good came of that now, did it? Nine months later…
I will tell you one more time Ashley. Stay off the internet. Leave this poor Church & their Saint Chris alone. Have the nuns at the academy not taught you to honor your spiritual forebears?
You are to immediately stop this nonsense. Next time, mum and step-daddy will cut the Shaw cable and you can sit in the dark thinking about what an ill-behaved ninny you are. Love Always, your mum.